Hai Romale! Display the Virginity's Flag!

Friday, October 31, 2008

Bring the Sheet!


What a shukar* word... and world!
Especially for guys!

A little bird told me that almost every man dreams of having sex with a virgin. To conquer not merely the virgin's innocent heart, but also her “tightly closed door” means to be a real warrior... One who is very, very courageous when it comes to sex. So, appreciate, ladies, those men who had sex with virgins! Not all are so lucky!
They are a few ... You can count them by using your 20 fingers... And the bad news is that soon will disappear at all... They will have to be registered in the “Red Book” ... As well as virgins...

Nowadays virginity is something special, an extraordinary phenomena which is a very rare treasure among young people... But not in Gypsies' families...

Gypsies approach this matter with gravity... According to their traditions, a girl MUST be a virgin until the wedding night. She has to bid farewell to the “magic sheath” amid the wedding party.

Whereas your guests savor the taste of popping black Caviars and drink expensive vodka, the bride and her future husband leave and guess, what do they do?

Oh yes!!! “Dinga-dinga!” They make love.

Needless to mention: on a white blanket or piece of fabric. What for? Shame on you! Of course! To display that piece of sheet adorned with an enticing spot of blood to all wedding guests.

Hip-hip hurrah! The bride was a virgin! Hai, Romale! The bride was a virgin! Here is the proof! Respect and dowry to the bridal couple!

The fiesta continues... while the joyful match maker dances with that piece of sheet all night long!

One more thing to mention. If the budding husband is not capable to do “that”... Well, there are many reasons why he couldn't (exhaustion because of too much dancing or vodka, emotions... her first sexual experience, after all)... Eccola!- the match maker interferes... Usually the match maker is an old woman who wears a few bright petticoats, tones of gold on fingers (don't know about the toes) and some rows of red colored necklaces around the neck...

Match Maker Rescues Rangers!

So, if the man can't assume the responsibility to “love” his woman, the match maker performs it instead of his “flaccid” tool. How does she do that? No idea... Maybe with her finger or with a super-duper elaborate vibrator... Well, I don't really know the concrete techniques but THE SPOT HAS TO BE ON THE FABRIC!!! By all means...

Now I am thinking... As I know, many girls don't bleed when they lose virginity. What's happening then? Will the guests believe the match maker and poor innocent wife?

It remains for me to add that I would never like to have sex with a wrinkled finger of an old woman! (that's in case I marry a Gypsy or restore my virginity!)

shukar*- The word comes from Gypsy language and it generally means cool, beautiful, nice, etc.

Ouch! Mom's Daughters, But so Different...

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Czech vs Russia

I like to travel. No wonder I am a wicked Sagittarius!
I like to take pictures.
I love my country.
But my curiosity is piqued when it comes to other “distant territories”. Far away, I feel free, relaxed and happy... Truly free! No responsibilities! No work! No monotony!
Only new sensations! Over there I have fun, I meet new people and “collect” new moments for my life's album.

Recently I was in Prague, Czech Republic. It was the YMCA Europe Festival held between 3rd - 9th August, 2008.

The weather was excellent! Young men were joyful and my mood was extraordinary!

So, here we are in Prague! Where everything is POZOR! Wherever you go and turn around, at every corner – POZOR!

What does it mean?

As I fluently speak Russian it was amusing for me to find out that the Czech word POZOR” reminded me of the Russian word ПОЗОРwhich means DISGRACE.

Well, I have found its meaning in no time! It's all about ATTENTION”or “CAUTION
So what do we have? -
ATTENTION!and DISGRACE. 2 different meanings! The same spelling! The same root!

Ty vonaš!= You smell nice!Say it to a Czech lady and she'll present you with a sexy smile you'll never forget.
Say it to a Russian girl and get ready to get a sexy kick! She will understand it as:
Tы воняешь! which means You stink!

That was a note of “umor (Russian) = humor and “umor” (Czech) = repayment (as mortgage repayment)... The first variant is better in this case...

Great tricks! :))

And what's funny is that both languages have the same Mom, called Slavic. One daughter is christened West Slavic (Czech) and the another one - East Slavic (Russian).

The same Mom! Two sisters! But so different!

Monday, October 27, 2008

"To the world you might be one person, but to one person you might be the whole world."

Gabriel Garcia Marquez

Test: Left vs Right!

Thursday, October 23, 2008

OK! Just something relaxing and funny!

Perhaps you know that our brain has two hemispheres. The left hemisphere controls the right side of the body. The right hemisphere - the left side.

The left hemisphere is the “residence” of communication, numbers, words, ability to analyze and logically think. Left hemisphere deals with mathematics, science, calculation and rationality.
Traditional left hemisphere
dominant proffessions: engineer, economist, mathematician, administrator, lawyer, chemist, etc.

The right hemisphere is responsible for one's voice intonation, music, imagination, rhythm, perception of colors.
If the left hemisphere is tightly related to logic, the right hemisphere is about intuition, illogic, Platonism, spirituality, poetry, romance, religion, myth.
Traditional right hemisphere dominant proffessions
: actor, musician, drawer, dancer, singer, poet, psychologist, manager, artist, philosopher, etc.

Now... In order to test which side of you brain is dominant stare for 30 seconds at this nicely-shaped woman spinning around... Focus on her movements:

According to The Daily Telegraph, if the dancer turns clockwise that means that the right side of your brain is dominant and vice versa. Play fair! And don't spin around in your chair! Don't tilt your head back for the image to appear in other foreshortening.

The researchers of the Yale University dedicated 5 years to analyzing the human brain and its functions. It was concluded that both directions can be seen. Most people see the dancing lady turning anti-clockwise. However, 14 % of the surveyed subjects changed the direction of the spinning body. Those who can do it are said to “own” an
IQ over 160.
So, if you try your best to concentrate on this rotating body you may succeed in changing the directions of the spinning woman.

The final verdict?!!
I AM A GENIUS!!!! No more comments!

Men don't need Mute Swans under Sheets!

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Well, if there is something in this world that would embarrass me very, very much is the way I look during ... my "little death"!

One thing is clear! I am absolutely sure that it isn't so expressive and overwhelming as that of Jennifer Aniston in Bruce Almighty” or Meg Ryan in When Harry met Sally”.

Mine is something like this:

The back curves like a playful cord of a guitar... A position that makes me look like one of Tchaikovsky's swans ready for a 5-seconds migration to an euphoric realm.

Warm, ripe, soft, rosy-cheeked...
With a mime that radiates satisfaction, fulfillment...
2 dizzy eyes that are largely opened up but, actually, don't see anything... I would say orgasms make me blind. And a roaring voice that wakes up a whole district... It surpasses even the morning cackling of the neighbor's hens.
The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette. Perfectly related to me.

The funniest thing is that men are so confident, ladies, when we are so artistic and naughty during the intercourse. P'raps, mute swans are more appreciated than whistling ones when it comes to quotidian problems, housework and daily events. But, it's not a secret that all men want to satisfy a prima donna in their bedroom. And although men are said to love with their hungry eyes even the most “stifling” groan emitted by a woman during intercourse is welcomed with tumultuous applauses.

So, no more pantomime, womankind! Take some opera classes, listen to Maria Callas' etudes and drink raw eggs in the morning. For a more appealing voice!

Who are Chattier, Men or Women?

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Last week I presented my parents with 2 dandy parrots. Today they are christened Sophie and either Rome, Casper, Scooby, Snoopy or perhaps Chip... Not yet officially nicknamed.

What's surprising is that when it comes to the Realm of Parrots females are less valuable than males. They even cost much less than male parrots. Voila! A note of discrimination, you see!
The story goes that the owner of a light colored beak and the “producer” of eggs is not capable to sing and say words. Parrot males pretend they are real polyglots, sworn brothers with Pavarotti and ultra-mega-super-extra skillful linguists! They are said to have
phenomenal talking abilities.

How about humans? Who proved to be as talkative as a male parrot, women or men?
According to some surveys a woman uses 8000 words per day to express herself while a man - a mere 3000.
That means women are around three times more garrulous than men. However, 2 minutes ago I've found out that this is a pure myth. Men need around 300 words to keep pace with women. Well, to my mind that should be the last thing for a man to compete with a woman.

So, whom to believe?
hat's the chattiest gender? Who's the most blah-blah-blah-stic, he or she?

For You, Who Takes Life Too Seriously!

Life Jokes
  • He who laughs last thinks slowest.

  • Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back.
  • A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
  • No one is listening until you make a mistake.
  • Get a new car for your spouse - it'll be a great trade!
  • Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.
  • How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand...

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Make Hay while the Sun Shines!

Friday, October 10, 2008

Yesterday, while wandering my lively eyes through the faded pages of my grandma's dusty copybook I've noticed a brilliant quote by an anonymous author:

Time is like a snow-flake. While you try to decide what to do with it, it melts on your nose.

That's a simple, clear saying which hides a deep truth.

You do affirm: “I have a long, beautiful life to live... I plan to marry an amazing man and nurture three kids, a lazy cat, a Pekingese and 2 talkative parrots... We will live in a big house with a rose garden...We'll have our own swimming pool and... ”
Thumbs up! Every one should set goals and have FUTURE
But how about NOW?

Just shake your brains with all your might and let your mind think of life's core. What if tomorrow never comes? - Damn it! You don't like this idea! No wonder! However, always remember, tomorrow is not promised!

By the way, has somebody read “This is Your Life, Not a Dress Rehearsal” by
Jim Donovan? That's an amazing book dedicated to those who aren't capable to value every second of
their existence, who die with their music still in them” (RALPH WALDO EMERSON).
I truly recommend this book to you, dear friends. You have nothing to lose but just an itty-bitty snow-flake.

In a nutshell, life is precious and very unpredictable. Don't hesitate to live it today! Have fun! Take time to stop and smell your neighbor's roses! Appreciate and love the persons who are close to you. Bring them smiles on face and joy in soul. Carpe diem! Seize the day and remember:

Yesterday is history

Tomorrow is a mystery

Today is a gift

That's why it's called the present!

Jim Donovan

PS. I collect quotes from everywhere as others collect coins or postage stamps. From time to time I will "adorn" my blog with such phrases just to wake up your mind. For some instants of meditation...

What's Easier, to Hate or Love?

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Today my mind was preoccupied with this question. The final verdict?! I am not ready to clearly answer it.

However, after some hesitations, confused and frustrated I have concluded that it is better to love.
When you hate, you destroy yourself from the inside. Inch by inch and millimeter by millimeter your ego is wounded by a tornado of negative emotions. Your eyes are not so bright and they don't smile anymore. Hate is like poison. It quickly spreads all over the body.
And one fine day you realize that you feel exhausted, weak and tired of this disease. Hate is destructive.

They say love is constructive. However, notice! When you love, you are systematically visited by fear. The phenomena of love automatically develops the fear to be rejected. You don't know whether your feelings will be accepted or rejected by the person you care for. The object of your love could easily spell a bold “NO”. And this expressive 2-lettered word is very painful. Fear intensifies. Anxious and agitated your ego asks your deep feeling to “flatten”. The fight is awful. The more explosive love is, the greater becomes the fear of losing the beloved person. It gradually increases in intensity and generously gnaws your sincere feelings. It may turn into jealousy, low self-esteem, possessiveness and hate.

Nevertheless, like it or not, love brings happiness. Many, many smiles on face... Playful butterflies in stomach... Romance, tears, good mood and fantastic moments, hope, fun, delight, sun, peace... Briefly saying, one thing is sure:

LOVE has to be lived here on earth!

Time and only Time...

Once upon a time there was an island where lived all human feelings: Wisdom, Love, Jealousy, Happiness, Sadness, Arrogance, Guilt, Fear, Grief, etc.

One fine day feelings heard that their island will soon sink. Island's natives were asked to immediately evacuate their lovely homes. No sooner said than done. Feelings wished Good Luck to each other, took their passports and embarked their ships.
Only Love decided to stay thus showing her deep love for her cherished nestle.
As it was predicted, Feelings' Island began to sink. Chaos... Fear was in panic... Sadness was crying... Love has realized that she has to survive as Hope wasn't nearby. Thus she started to desperately call for help:
Sadness, dear! Can you take me with you?
- Oh, Love, I am so sad that I need to be alone. I need privacy.

Wealth's luxurious ship passed by.
Wealth, please help me! I am drowning!
- Oh! Love, I am so sorry. But I can not take you in here. I have too much gold and silver in my ship. I don't have a place for you.

Vanity! Oh Vanity! Take me in your ship!
- Nope! You are wet but my boat is very gorgeous. I am afraid you will damage it.

Happiness (Love's best friend) was so satisfied and joyful that she hadn't heard Love's despairing shrieks.

Tired and exhausted Love thought that was the end of her life. Suddenly - a strong grasp - and Bach! - Love felt a hand that pulled her onto a ship!
- Hey, Love, come here! I will take you with me!
Love felt so grateful but weak to say a word nor recognize her savior. She was left on a neighboring island while the courageous hero moved away to save other feelings.
Along came
Knowledge who respectfully waived at the stranger from the boat.

- Knowledge, who is that man?
- Time? He has saved me! Hmmm... But why namely Time? Not Vanity, Sadness, Wealth or even my best friend Happiness?
Knowledge, full of
Wisdom has answered the question:
Love! When all else fails, Time and only Time is capable to truly understand how important YOU are in life...

An Intro... to Life's Core!

Monday, October 6, 2008


Actually, I am glad to see everyone in here... be you a lesbian or heterosexual, Chinese or American, fat or skinny, ... Be you a hairy pervert, bald handicap, famous painter or a simple teacher of chemistry in school... you are welcome!

However, for all those who are interested in this blog, I would like to bring to your attention several things:

  • If you are willing to find out what's in a lady's mind and soul at all times and at every hour, please make yourself more comfortable. I'll write everything about what I feel, think and believe. No wonder! I admit the fact that some of you will consider me weird because of my freak ideas about life. The good news is that gradually you will get accustomed with these ideas and you'll like to read them all.

  • If you expect from me super-duper intelligent posts, reliable theory and deep analysis, pass by and don't waste your time in vain! My logo is the following: “I appreciate Intelligence but I love Kindness.”

  • Mistakes or maybe some winding words... that's okay. Don't say I didn't avert you.

  • If you have any idea and/or a funny comment regarding the revealed thoughts, feel free to type a few words and express yourself... I will appreciate your gesture.

  • If you are a pedophile, chauvinist, racialist, please, stay away from this "home"! It's not dedicated to you!